Halloween

I was able to see my granddaughter this evening. She was so cute in her little Halloween costume.  She was a leopard. Her sister was an evil fairy.  She was really cute, too.
It reminded me of when my kids were little.  I always loved to dress up the children in their costumes.  Sometimes I would make them - like Dorothy costumes when Dorothy wasn't popular. If I had only known what was going on in their lives.  What nightmares they were living as they were being stalked by their father.  The terror within in the one place you should feel the safest.
There is, at least to me, nothing worse than being afraid. Walking on eggshells, trying to appease him. The rules always changing. Thinking he wouldn't hurt the children if I only did everything I could; and later discovering that they thought they could keep him from hurting me if they only did everything he wanted. And all the time, we were hurting and hurting.
One year, his parents came out for their annual visit close to Halloween. They would take the car and go to the mall to walk around leaving the kids and me home alone.  Then they would come home to watch tv and take a short walk with the kids. I remember how no one could speak when the tv was on; they were mesmorized. And I would fix dinner. Right before everything was ready to serve, my mother-in-law would put her pencil in her puzzle book to keep her place and would get up to ask if she could do anything. It would always be done.
I think it was the same year that I found several things missing: towels and other things.  They were very careful of their suitcases, so I always thought that they took my towels home with them.  They felt that I had too many things, including wooden spoons. I only needed one: Just stir everything with one spoon.